me & teh Jesse are now on break...we didnt "break up" technically per say as much as just on a break until we can meet back up for good after college...i like the way this feels...i wish we had done it sooner though, partially because, i feel as though i needed him the most at this stage of my life, with the move, the hate from my family, the abandonment of friends, the fear of failure, the fear of even more loss...it really only hurts cuz i feel as though i lost him as a best friend...not so much lost as much as it feels like he went from a BEST friend, to a friend....like some of the things we arent going to do anymore, cuz its things that 'couples' do; Best friends do as well, like having conversations till 6 in the morning, random 2 am calls to see if they're still awake (lolz)...some of the things the things we cant do i do miss, like we're not allowed to talk as much, not allowed to mention cuddling each other or anything like that...i guess im okay with it...i mean if its for personal growth then i guess its the best...i still love him & he still loves me, its just us, separating ourselves from each other a little more...it feels good...it just feels right...i mean i'll think about it too much into detail & it'll hurt...but then i think about all the good its doing for us, then i feel a little better then i talk to lauryn & i feel totally better lol....thats all...